Scold Till They Cry, Spank Till They Bruise

One of my best buds, a fellow mom, posted in her blog the worry of not being able to love her child enough. Valid consideration, definitely. But we must also be aware of its opposite--- loving our children too much, for there is such a thing.

I have heard of children taking advantage of their parents: stealing money, intentionally lambasting them, even mauling them for any doggone reason. In the end, should it come to a bitter one, the parents still take the blame for spoiling the children.

They say, "That's how kids are. Let kids be kids. They'll outgrow this childishness. We were all like them before." God forbid we grew up stealing money when we could have just asked for it. Wanting to crush the feelings of our parents because we didn't get our way--- I hope we were also remorseful after. But becoming violent with a parent is totally disturbing for our generation, sadly not for today's. Ergo, we were not like them before.

Parenting is a skill I think we should all learn FORMALLY. When our kids wreak havoc, it's not like the cops could meddle. Every authority would slap back the responsibility to us parents in case our kids need discipline. The question is--- do you know how to discipline your kids? Do you care to scold them until they cry, or even spank them till they bruise?

It's true that we should not study the best way to hurt people, most especially our own kids. But we also have to question modern theory about always sparing the rod or gentle reprimand, or even plain "letting them be". Being extremely lenient to your kids may be hip to a lot (particularly the ones who experienced childhood cruelty), and using the iron fist may be so last century--- but we've got to balance things out and not tip to one parenting style too much. If you have to pinch, go ahead, that is your kid, and within limits that is still love.

You may not agree with me when I say that kids nowadays could trade their folks for a bag of weed, but I am sure at one point you have heard a nasty story like that. We should rectify it while we can and not wait for the time when the unruly kids we rear would scream back at us, "It's not that you love me too much, it's that YOU were not loved enough. Stupid bitch."