Toilet Humor

Will somebody tell me how to use this? :-)

This is what we can call Twin Sharing... Good for mommies like moi whose kids still follow them in the loo. It's actually great news, close to a breakthrough--- a very considerate although embarrassing execution of an idea that has actually been in many mothers' heads for so long. Now, if the little tot has to go the same time I have to, no problem. Neither of us will have to sport that "wet look", after all, it's no longer the 80's.

This one for the Nobel Prize for inventions. (Is there even such thing?)

Dance, not sing, in the shower

My little princess hasn't outgrown bathing with her Mommy. I should be weaning her away from this habit but it scares me that she is five, and her every move is a dance step. As I've said in my other blog, I am "nanay ni Shakira" (mother of Shakira).

To compromise her vice of sudden sharp movements, I decided to teach her slower but still dance-able songs like the one below.

My Li'l Girl's Bath Song

F I R E (Babyface & Des'ree)

You're riding in my car
I turn on the radio
I'm pulling you closer
But you keep tellin' me no
You say you don't like it
But I know you're a liar'
Cause when we kiss
Ooh...Fire

Late at night
You're taking me home
You say you wanna stay
But I want you to go
Say I don't love you
But you know I'm a liar
'Cause when we kiss
Ooh...Fire

You had a hold on me right from the start
A grip so tight I couldn't tear it apart
My nerves all jumpin' actin' like a fool
Well my kisses might burn
But my heart stays cool
Well Romeo and Juliet
Samson and Delilah
Baby you can bet
They were burnin' with desire
If I say split
Then I know that I'd be lying
'Cause when we kiss
Ooh...Fire

When we kissI
'm on fire
Your tenderness
Gives me desire
I can't resist
Your tender lips
When we kiss
Ooh...Fire

Are We There Yet?

You've probably seen a countdown on teevee, or overheard party plans at your workplace. Maybe your kid is planning her list 'cuz Santa's done with his?

You probably found that big box of Christmas lights that you swore NOT to put up this year because it's just too damn expensive... but you will, just wait and see.

What about the experiment of giving away group presents instead of individual? Are you sure??? Do you want your kid to receive a gift pack saying "To the little one and the whole family"--- and then discover a wall clock inside??? Don't you find that quite mean?

Sometimes, you still don't know what to expect for the holidays. And that's what makes it so freaking fun.

HIGH HOPES

(Writers: Cahn / Van Heusen)Frank Sinatra

Next time your found, with your chin on the ground
There a lot to be learned, so look around
Just what makes that little old ant
Think he'll move that rubber tree plant
Anyone knows an ant, can't
Move a rubber tree plant
But he's got high hopes, he's got high hopes
He's got high apple pie, in the sky hopes
So any time your gettin' low 'stead of lettin' go
Just remember that ant
Oops there goes another rubber tree plant
When troubles call, and your back's to the wall
There a lot to be learned, that wall could fall
Once there was a silly old ram
Thought he'd punch a hole in a dam
No one could make that ram, scram
He kept buttin' that dam
'Cause he had high hopes, he had high hopes
He had high apple pie, in the sky hopes
So any time your feelin' bad 'stead of feelin' sad
Just remember that ram
Oops there goes a billion kilowatt dam
All problems just a toy balloon
They'll be bursted soon
They're just bound to go pop
Oops there goes another problem kerplop

When you wish upon a star
Makes no difference who you are
Anything your heart desires
Will come to you